Are you miserably
surrounded by difficult people – people who are sulky all the time, who shout
and never speak, who think they are always right, who boss you around? They can
be really your boss, your siblings, friends or even your spouse! Have you ever
tried to change them, reason with them, ignore them, or abandon them in the
end? Or are you a difficult person yourself? Let me first assume you are not so
that we can focus on how to deal with or even live with difficult people.
I have internalized two principles
that are useful to me. I am always at peace with myself and all those difficult
people who happen to be in my path!
Rule no. 1: Have mercy on
them! Don’t hate them! Hating someone strains your energy and adds horrible
lines to your forehead. Back off when they shout. Don’t shout back! You are not
being small. You demonstrate you are bigger! Keep your control. Empathize with
them. Your calmness might put them head over heels! Wouldn’t that amuse you?
When the heat subsides, go and explain yourself. Say what you want to. That’s
it. You have done your part.
Rule no. 2: Never try to
change them not because old dogs can’t learn new tricks but because many people
must have tried. If they haven’t succeeded, why do you think you can? Take them
as they are or leave them for good. As to those you can’t leave, say your
siblings, distance them but maintain courtesy.