Have there been moments in life when you feel so negative inside that you actually hate yourself? You are in desperate need of support and yet too private or proud to seek help! Time to switch on the self-rescue mechanism!
One tends to eagerly dive into pleasing experiences to bury unpleasant ones. Fine-dining! Binge drinking! Shopping sprees! Going on a trip! Changing oneself physically! The list can go on. But to one’s dismay, the transient comfort these bring just comes and goes and the negative emotions resurface. One is again drowned in the sea of desperation.
I have a friend who has not been sound asleep for years and another one who sobs all of a sudden and seemingly unprovoked! Both of them have tried all sorts of self-help devices but they are still not able to salvage themselves!
If my two friends truly do love themselves, they have to take the bull by the horns - rationally analyze the causes of their negativity! But they don’t. And until now, I do not have the courage to frankly talk to them fearing that I might lose them!
Can I tell them that they are but numbing themselves? The vacuum is not filled! The relationship is still sour! They are still swept aside! The gap is not closed! The career is still going nowhere! Observation tells me that they have become so used to the pain that eradicating it might leave them at a loss.
My two friends share one commonality – they love someone or something more than themselves. In one case, it is her man – someone’s husband. For the other friend, it is his job! They spend all their time and energy on these “love affairs” totally ignoring themselves and yet are not “rewarded” as they think they should have.
The first step they should take is to slowly step back to examine their own needs and desires. They should find time for self-care and self-love! Enjoy the me-time pleasure! They might feel guilty at first but once they get past it, salvation is close!